WBC Update: Who Needs Yu?

Is there any doubt who the best international pitcher in the world is?

Did you touch my ass? I know your tricks, Dewey.

Daisuke Matsuzaka methodically picked apart the Cuban national team last night to move Japan one step closer to the crystal skull a second consecutive World Baseball Classic title. Throwing only 86 pitches, Matsuzaka confounded the Cubans with tailing fastballs, sliders, and representative democracy through six innings. He struck out eight and (prepare to crap your pants, Red Sox fans) walked nobody. Four of the strikeouts were Cubans caught looking (which, ironically, is the name of a popular candid camera-style show on the island). Dice-K gave up 5 hits - all singles.

And then Dewey touched my ass, like this.

In 3 first round games, Cuba scored 29 runs and allowed 9. In short, they were dominant. They were the best team in Group C and sported the best offense in the tournament. Matsuzaka, like Leonidas before him, stood at the mountain pass of the mound and said: THIS IS JAPAN'S REPRESENTATION AT THE 2009 WORLD BASEBALL CLASSIC MINUS INJURIES!

Proper ass-touching form.

It is frustrating to watch Matsuzaka dominate the international baseball scene. Whether the blame falls on him or on Sox catcher Jason Varitek, Matsuzaka spends the MLB season dancing around the strike zone. This makes his late-breaking slider (his strikeout pitch) much less effective, and it allows hitters to sit on the changeup which, because of the movement on his fastball, ends up fooling fewer people than it should when used effectively. Sure the Cubans are an aggressive offensive team, but with half the strikeouts catching the batter looking, it's clear that Matsuzaka is much more effective as an aggressive pitcher. If you're a catcher, it must be fun to play with his wide array of moving pitches, but when he goes after batters he is capable of hitting a rhythm that makes him virtually untouchable. The kind of rhythm that keeps hitters guessing even on their second and third trip to the plate.

In other news, the Dominican Republic is still knocked out, so expect copious A-Roid jokes until Bojo challenges me to another bet.